insane train

life on the tracks

Thursday, August 31, 2006

TRAILBLAZING TRAIN INVENTIONS #1

The Frontpack

I noticed that in the train, a lot of people wear their knapsacks in the front. I know this is a usual precaution taken in thief-prone areas, and from the population of backpack wearers who don this style of lugging, it’s obvious that the train is one of those hazardous locations as well.

So, I propose that some manufacturer create the ultimate theft prevention bag: ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the Frontpack!!! (insert sound of clapping)

(read with infomercial-like voice) Why bother using the backpack when half the time you wear it in the front? Might as well create a bag that you can wear properly in front all the time! The Frontpack creates a world of advantage, for men and women, the young and old. You will be seeing your stuff right under your nose, literally! So you can keep a close eye on your valuables, and see those scruffy hands that keep on trying to steal your stuff! Also, women need not feel uncomfortable anymore about men trying to look down their shirts! The Frontpack can hide their assets, therefore securing them of a long, peek-free journey! Men too have advantages when wearing the Frontpack. With the Frontpack covering their precious jewels, they can guarantee that the women around them will not be harassed since their magic sticks are tucked, covered, and behaved!

Heehee.

(now back to regularly scheduled blogging) I personally hate this particular backpack-slung-front kinda look. I acknowledge it’s usefulness, sometimes I even do it myself (defense: sometimes we do the things we hate anyway, why not protect myself in the process. But it looks sooo unkempt, and my knapsack protests to this – backpacks weren’t made for this sort of thing). So why not incorporate a design that will execute this look/protection properly, right? Right.

Well, it might not be the epitome of cool, but it's practical, and not being a victim of theft? That's awesome.

Q